mariellemanahan

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

This Love Goes Beyond "I Do"

Last October 11 and 12, Michael and I got to attend our very first Couples' Getaway called Beyond I Do. It was pretty special for us because in the almost three years that I've been working in Victory Ortigas, we were finally able to attend a couples' retreat.

Aside from the fact that it was a great time to meet other married couples, a rare occasion to dress in famous couples costumes, and a perfect excuse to spend quality time with the hubby, Michael and I learned so many things that definitely will help us build strong foundations for our marriage.

Couples, costumes, and cuddles

In a nutshell, here's my key take away:

Marriage is about giving, giving, giving. Most, if not all, of us get into a relationship for what we can get get get from the other person. "This person can make me happy. This person can give me security." Yada yada yada. And that's not bad. It's simply human nature. But marriage is about giving--giving of one's self. As both husband and wife keep giving, both are able to receive love, understanding, patience, and sacrifice (to name a few) from one another.

This is something I've known intuitively, but makes so much more sense to me now that it's articulated. I'm so thankful for retreats like these. Can't wait for the next one!

Labels: church, inspiration, love

posted by mari_elle at 22:12
tell marielle? (0)

Sunday, October 06, 2013

Amazing Grace for the Perfectionist

"I dwelled on my failures and brooded over my momentary successes. In short, I was spending way too much time thinking about me and what I needed to do, and far too little time thinking about Jesus and what He had already done for me. What I discovered was that the more I focused on my need to get better, the worse I actually got—the more neurotic and self-conscious and self-absorbed I became. And so God took me up on my unwitting invitation to the congregation and gave me the gift I never meant to ask for: He gave me the gift of suffering. God did not rescue me out of the pain; He rescued me through the pain!" Excerpt from Glorius Ruin by Tullian Tchividjian

I'm admittedly a person who tends to be too hard on myself, especially when I fail or fall short on something. Whenever I'm given any criticism, whether constructive or destructive, I seem to react in the same way--which is by berating myself for not measuring up. Then I fall into a vain pursuit of perfection and human acceptance that quite frankly, doesn't do me any good. In the end, I just feel like I've chased after the wind.

Pastor Tullian's book is really helping me to see how He is present in every kind of suffering--yes, even the kind that is brought about by our failures. The excerpt I mentioned above is making me realize that my reaction to criticism is a failure on my part to understand that everything that I do is all about Jesus. It's not about me, my excellence at work, the pat on the back I can get from my bosses, or even the sense of satisfaction that comes with doing something great. It's about serving Jesus, doing the best I can, and then going back to Jesus all over again.

Failure is not the end of the world, and yes, I'm talking to you, my fellow perfectionist. Failure teaches is that only our Savior, Jesus Christ, is perfect, and that as His perfect grace works in and through us, excellence will follow in all that we do. And even when we make mistakes, that doesn't make us any less of a person. That just gives us an opportunity to tap on God's unfailing grace even more.

Labels: faith, work